The Case for Scottish Comedy

I went to your first live Billy Connolly stand up comedy show earlier this week.

First off, let me preface this by saying I have a kind of fear of live comedy. I have seen the odd stand up comic whose sense of humour and timing have left me cold, and those few instances of intense discomfort, as the comic stands expectantly, awaiting a torrent of laughter that I cannot honestly deliver.

Luckily, this was not the case at the Billy Connolly performance. Even when using material I have heard several times before, Connolly's enthusiasm and energy and his ease up on stage made the performance both amusing and, even during the slower or more predictable points, he was never boring.

I noted a Scot or two in the crowd, wearing their kilts in a display of Scottish pride that the man on stage did not feel the need to show himself. There were other people who were offered better seats and so, for the first hour of the performance, there was an irritating trickle of people down the stairs in front of me towards their better view - a really poor system on the part of the organisers, I thought. However, the saddest night of the evening was a lost elderly gentleman, who had obviously gone to find a drink or head off to the toilet, and wandered back to his section... and could not find his seat. He hung around the stairwell and (mildly infuriatingly) directly in line between some spectators and the stage, and finally sat down on the floor in resignation, his companions either unable or unwilling to assist him back to his seat. Bless.

Luckily, Connolly kept the night humming, the crowd buzzing and laughing. There were die hard Billy fans in the audience, who must have heard before even more of his anecdotes than I had, but they were not disappointed. And neither was I.

Would I go again? Perhaps not every year. But if I need a good live laugh, I now know where I can find them.

Verdict: Billy Connolly's show was a whole heap of fun. There were highlights and lowlights, but overal, definitely worth the ticket price. 7 Scottish Clansmen out of 10.

The Case for Kiddie Nostalgia - Part 1

It has been a long while since I put together a weekend edition of Judge & Jury. Commitments, general business and a lack of inspiration have all played their part in keeping me away.

But not today - no, I have been inspired by a conversation I had a few weeks ago to revisit the past and some old childhood friends with whom, through the magic of DVD, it may be possible to be reunited. If any readers in blogland can think of people I may have forgotten, please let me know.

Now, by way of introduction, we were discussing some TV shows from years past. My age showed through in a lot of the discussion, mainly in the extra detail I was able to bring to the recollections that my more aged brain had stored uselessly within its cells. The oddest thing about these shows, that I recall both with fondness and a mild amount of horror, is how they appear to have influenced me and my current tastes. They are shows I think I will one day have to obtain on DVD to relive, yet at the same time, I do fear that they may not be quite the shining beacons of child entertainment excellence that I once thought they were...

And so, enough introduction; now lets get on to it, with hyperlinks where I can find them:

1. Star Fleet / Bomber X

Memories: I think this was the show that started our particular geek discussion, and for both of us, it was a fairly vague memory of supermarionation and Japanese robots.



I am a bit of a Sci Fi space battle nut, so what I mainly remembered was lots explosions and encounters, though mostly the fights all ended up fairly inconclusively, and there was a space ship and a robot... and that was about it. I seem to recall at the time I had the realisation that this was a Japanese series, or at least dubbed, but who cared? As long as there were space ship and things going bang I was happy.

Influences: Perhaps I can trace my enjoyment of Japanese manga back to this show. Hideous dubbing and exaggerated expressions, large eyes and confusing storylines - I was weaned on them. I doubt Star Fleet will in any way be comparable to the incredible Gundam: Seed (well, besides the fact they are about space ships and giant robots... actually, they are fairly comparable), but if it took me to that place, then it was a great start.

DVD: Actually, it can be bought, now I come to look for it! Amazon UK! And if the NZ dollar was actually worth anything, I might have to buy it! Wonder what the chances of Real Groovy getting a copy are...


2. Mysterious Cities of Gold

Memories: I think this came a bit later that Star Fleet / Bomber X, but this one for some reason stuck a lot longer in the memory (see Influences).

I seem to recall I missed the earlier episodes, but when I got into it, I really got into it and had to make it back from school to make it, come hell or high water. Esteban and his gang of youthful adventurers found amazingly eco-friendly craft and went wandering around South America in search of El Dorado. I loved the cheesy opening song, the Japanese-y animation (though apparently this is a French coproduction) and I learned something at the end of every episode, as I recalled there was a "fabulous real South American facts" section at the end. Entertaining and informative - a parent's dream!

Influences: Well, this year I am off to explore one of those mysterious cities deep in South America. I am not touring the whole continent or anything, but I am very certain my desire to visit the sites of ancient Incan civilisations were in no small part instilled through watching this show.

DVD: Again, Amazon UK has a version or two on its books. For some reasons, I think the Mysterious Cities of Gold would hold up better than Star Fleet, but still the unfavourable exchange rate holds me back. Perhaps once I am back from exploring those cities myself...

And finally, as I have other things to do today:

3. The Lost Islands

Okay, this one I feel a certain kind of shame writing about (considering what I have just written, I know this might sound a bit ironic), but then, this was an Australian series. But it keeps coming up, and once you hear the theme song (yes, please click this link), everyone who was a child in the 80s will remember the man whose face was in a mask (with a very english accent on the "ask").

Yes, Tony, Mark and David, Anna and... the other one were lost on a deserted island that was also lost in time. It was all about young people struggling against oppresive adults, though these youths were armed with knowledge denied the local inhabitants. There was a hint of mystery, a touch of danger, and quite a bit of subterfuge and awful effects, and I seem to recall the Australian lad ended up as the good natured leader, and again, it was quite addictive. But did they ever get off? I don't recall...

Influnces: For me, the TV current series Lost is always linked to this early, cheaper version. They aren't a huge amount alike, to be honest, but the whole "mysterious isle" thing for me is the strongest link. However, the Lost Islands never really made me want to get stranded on an island somewhere - though I ended up in New Caledonia for 9 months, so perhaps it had more of an influence than I thought.

DVD: No sign of it, and actually, I am quite glad of that.

Verdict: Oh, the 80s! Youth! So many memories! And, as I remember more of them, I will share them all with you and see if you too recall these blasts from the past! 75 reminiscences out of 80.

The Case for Slumming It

For the first time in quite a while, I went to a fairly popular (as in well-attended) movie. Of course, it helped that it was at the glorious Embassy cinema, that the film is a recent release, and also that the hype for the film has been extraordinary. But, in the end, the reason for Slumdog Millionaire’s popularity proved to be that it is a really good film.

Slumdog Millionaire is a love story set against the backdrop of contemporary India, where extreme poverty and crime lords clash with incredible cultural beauty and multinational corporations. This is not the sanitised Bollywood of Bride and Prejudice, nor the wrist-slitting grit and melancholy of most of the recent prize-winning Indian novels, but a combination of the two. India is shown as a land of extremes, and the lead characters’ lives cover all (or at least, a lot) of them.

While the location may be quite exotic to Western eyes, the underlying story is nothing new. Boy meets girl, boy loses girl, boy meets girl again, boy kind of loses her again, boy goes on Who Wants to be a Millionaire India. Some of the twists and turns are telegraphed a mile away, but how those twists and turns are incorporated into the story, and always linked back to the WWTBAM questions, is brilliantly told.

All the actors are superb (though the WWTBAM host gave me the wiggins), even if some of the more clichéd scenes let them down. For me, the most annoying was the oft-repeated “spotting across a crowded train station” device, even though this is India and there are about 50 platforms between the players, not to mention the several hundred thousand people who constantly mill about the place as well – whereas I have a hard enough time spotting people at the relatively tiny Wellington terminus.

Once the at times amusing, at times harrowing, and always entertaining film is over (and for no particular reason that I can see), the final credits roll over a Bollywood dance scene performed by the cast. Perhaps this was a treat for the actors, to have them participate in something so light and frothy after their more serious scenes of violence and heartache. For me, it felt a bit odd ending on such a frivolous note, but it also seemed to cleanse the cinematic palate of any bitter aftertaste from the film, so all that was left at the forefront of the tongue was a lovely sensation of the amazing images and colours of India.

Verdict: Plot-wise, not really a revelation, but Slumdog Millionaire told a fairly simple story very well. An Extremely Hot on a scale of Indian spiciness.

The Case for Hopeless Emptiness Reinterpreted

Following on from my last Judgement, I was interested to hear, a few days later, the interpretation of Revolutionary Road from a different perspective.

Whereas I saw the film as a struggle against oppressive expectation, the film could also be viewed as a descent into madness, about being unable to deal or live within the confines of a normal life.

I am not sure if I will change my opinion about the films messages, but I did find it fascinating and challenging to hear another person's opinions on this kind of thing. It's a sign of a good movie that it can be interpreted different ways and generate discussion.

Verdict: Even better than before, and perhaps no less depressing.

Oh, and have a great Waitangi Day!

The Case for Hopeless Emptiness

I really liked Revolutionary Road up until the part where, on the Cunard ship over to France, Leonardo DiCaprio's character yells out "I'm the King of the World!".

Of course, that scene never actually happens in this film. Despite the fact Leonardo, Kate Winslet and Kathy Bates are all aboard this ship, it doesn't really sink, no matter how many icebergs people run into.

The film is harrowing - well, for those of us who aren't 17 year old girls at the front of the cinema enjoying Leo as eye candy (yes, there were some giggling girls there...). The film portrays life at is most numbing, with the 1950s American dream of a big house, a car and kids destroying all other dreams around it. The ideal middle American couple, Frank and April, live the ideal life, the only problem being that it is not the life they wanted. April finally gets the gumption to try and break out of the white picket prison they have built around themselves, remembering Frank's dreams of long ago, and they both decide to try and turn those dreams into their new reality.

Of course, everyone thinks they are crazy, apart from the local crazy man, who is the only one who really sympathises with their predicament. And I realise I am turning into Mr Plot Summary here, so I will end that right now.

This is really not a happy film. In fact, I can't recall any character in the film that comes across as happy. Every character seems to be playing a role that is not who they really are, and most seem to be able to live with it. But not everyone, as one scene in particular showed - the last time I saw eggs prepared in such a soul-crushing way, Beth Heke ended up with a couple of black eyes. Here, the wounds are not so obvious, but the soul ends up even more battered.

The acting is all superb, with the gorgeous Kate Winslet giving April a hopeless hopefulness, and Leonardo DiCaprio's Frank portrayed as a torn man looking up at the stars but living down in the gutter of "reality" and what is expected. Other characters come and go, but these two leave all others in the shade - they can really act when they want to. To me, the fact they played the unfeasibly romantic Rose and Jack in Titanic adds an extra dimension of that sense of "and this is what would have really happened if Jack and Rose had both survived".

And so, guess what? I liked this film. It struck a chord with me with its perceptive perspective on life. Truly, some of the most valuable things in life are people who understand you, encourage you and support you no matter what you say or what hairbrained scheme you may want to undertake. Everyone has different motivations and aspirations. But no one is an island. And Revolutionary Road shows how difficult it can be to start that revolution when one is rebelling against "the perfect life".

Verdict: It may not have been perfect, but I was too depressed to care. Revolutionay Road may not be a film for all occasions, but it definitely is an occasion. 4 Prozac pills out of 5, and a shot of vodka to wash them down.

The Case for Exorcisms

Well, I went to The Spirit, and on the way out, I imagined what the people who made the film had intended.

I imagined they thought the film was going to be humourous. I imagined they thought the cinematic style of draining most of the colours from the screen would be reminiscent of Sin City without being quite so dark. I imagined the 1930s pulp hero style male character blended with some modern strong and sexy female characters would appeal to men and women alike. I imagined they thought there film would be edgy, but still accessible to a PG13 audience. And I am sure they imagined that letting Samuel L Jackson rant and rave with the ravishing Scarlett Johanssen as his sidekick would have to be a winner.

It's a good thing I have a decent imagination, because in reality, the Spirit sucked.

No, that is not altogether fair. It did have some things going for it: whatever one might think of her merits as an actress, one cannot deny that Eva Mendes has a spectacular butt. And the spectacular Sarah Paulson is always amazing value, though, in a bitch slap to audiences everywhere who thought she could rescue this film, she is criminally underused.

There is no point regurgitating the plot as it really didn't look that good going down in the first place. Slow, ponderous, confused by all the different types of film it tries to be, the Spirit looks glossy but is as vapid and empty as the movie's title would suggest.

Verdict: Guess what? This one is being panned. The Spirit doesn't stand a ghost of a chance before this judge. One and a half Caspers out of five.

The Case for Aging Backwards

Never let it be said that the Judge does not listen to your pleas.

T'was with a large throng in a crowded cinema that I sat down to see the very, very long film The Curious Case of Benjamin Button.

As I think back over the plot, it actually seems a lot like a V.C. Andrews novel: a young abandoned boy finds mildly forbidden love at a young age with a ballet dancer, and then discovers a hidden fortune; and of course the main lovers are fantastically good looking, with not-so-good-looking mini-loves and colourful characters along the way. Luckily, there are no melodramatic cries of "Devil Spawn!" in this romantic drama though - it is all sentimental soppiness and soft focus lenses. In fact, the characters are all so nice that there is never even the possibility of b!tch fights breaking out, and interpersonal conflicts are rarely seen and never last.

And I really liked it. The ridiculously handsome Brad Pitt ages backwards, passing the luminous Cate Blanchett on his way down to infancy. The make up and digital aging effects are amazing, though I did wonder if the "old" Brad was a cross between current Brad and Gollum, so big were his eyes on his wizened head. I did love how Tilda Swinton's character was described as "very plain", as, while I concede she is not a traditional beauty, she definitely has an acute angular symmetry about her that would definitely take her looks into the "interesting" category.

Of course, the focus of the film shows youth as the more beautiful time in one's life, with age shown as sagging and wrinkly, but the way the film deals with life and death is touching, despite my best efforts to try and ignore the obvious ploys used. The montage of time spent by the love birds sailing about and spending life together is particularly saccharine, but beautiful and engaging (dammit!) nonetheless.

Overall, while the film is really, really long, it doesn't feel it (well, most of the time). The leads are always engaging, and the story mostly makes you forget how far-fetched a lot of it is - I kept expecting that Victoria Principal or a L'Oreal representative was going to pop up and feast on Brad's still beating heart to obtain his power of rejuvenation. And it is sweet, and soppy. And possibly Oscar-worthy.

Verdict: If you switch your critical brain centres off and wallow in the Southern sentimentality, you will probably love this film as much as I did. 80 Years out of 100.